It’s that time of year! We’re all finding out who our kids have for a teacher in the upcoming year. Most of us all have our heart set on a certain teacher and are disappointed when our child gets the “bad” teacher that no one wants. Here are a few tips on dealing with a difficult teacher:
No Teacher is “Bad”
First of all, most teachers are not “bad” or “good”. Most teachers have both good and bad qualities and the key is to appeal to their good qualities to maximize your child’s time in their classroom. Children need to learn to deal with all different kinds people and teachers are the perfect way to practice with positive guidance from their parents. There are many ways to build a positive relationship with your child’s teacher.
Difficult Teacher Tips:
It can be really hard to determine if your child has a bad teacher but if you’re concerned about your child’s teacher there are a few things you can do to determine and resolve teacher issues:
Listen to gossip – We all know that when we find out who our child has for a teacher, the first thing we do is try to get the scoop on what they’re like. Asking other parents is a great way to find out what to expect but make sure you take the gossip with a grain of salt. Different kids respond to teachers differently so don’t get nervous based on mom gossip. Also, if every other parent loves the teacher but your child hates them, consider the fact that you and your child may need to change not the teacher.
Believe your child – If your child tells you something is going on at school, believe them but ask a lot of questions. Most of the time kids are smart enough not to tell their parents about their own bad behavior. Find out as much as you can before contacting the teacher. If your child is accusing the teacher of being an unreasonable brute, consider the fact that your child is probably not the angel you think he is and may be contributing to the problem. “Mrs. Smith kept me in for recess today for no reason!” or “Mr. Jones said I was fooling around with my friends but I wasn’t” are not signs your child has a bad teacher. They are signs your child needs to learn how to behave at school. As an experienced mom all I hear in those statements is, “Mrs. Smith kept me in for recess today and I don’t want to admit why!” and “I was fooling around with my friends today and Mr. Jones caught me!”
Empower your child – Make sure you’re asking your child to take responsibility for what he may be doing to contribute to the situation. Teaching your child how to control the situation is a great way to empower them. “Mr. Jones yells everyday because he thinks you’re fooling around but you’re not? Why don’t you try folding your hands on your desk and facing forward. Maybe he thinks you’re fooling around because you laugh when other kids misbehave.” Chances are, you can rectify smaller problems through your child without reaching out to the teacher.
Take notes – Document everything your child tells you. Be as specific as possible and include dates. If your concerns do turn into a serious issue, documentation will be invaluable.
Be reasonable – Your child’s teacher is dealing with a large group of children everyday. Think of how difficult it is to deal with your child sometimes. Well the teacher is dealing with 20 of your child everyday. If they slip in any way, consider the fact that they are human.
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