Do you wonder if you’re saying “yes” or “no” too often or not enough? Do you ever feel like your kids are getting away with more the longer you parent?
As the youngest of six siblings, I was frequently reminded that I got away with more than they did.
I thought of my siblings’ complaints when I heard the same grumblings from my two oldest kids about their younger sister.
“She’s driving sooner than I was!”
“You used to never let me spend the night with friends as much as she does.”
“She gets more allowance than I did!”
And then, when my youngest was a senior in high school, I did something with her that I probably would have never done with the older two. I let her go to the midnight showing of a Twilight movie…on a SCHOOL night.
I remember refusing my oldest’s request to do the same thing when she was in high school. What had happened to me? Was I losing my ability to be a good parent?
No, I decided after much soul-searching about why I allowed such insane behavior, I was not a perfect parent, but I had learned how to pick my NOs.
Getting older has a way of helping us see more clearly what’s really important in life. Maybe some of the things that I made a big deal about when my two oldest were in high school really weren’t so important after all.
Just some of things, mind you. Picking my NOs doesn’t meant I never say no, it just means that I only say it when it when there is a darn good reason to say it.
As parents, we could literally be battling with our children all day long. That’s why it is so important to choose your battles, look for a reason to say yes, and do one thing your mother taught you never to do…Pick your NOs.